Sunday, September 28

 
rabbit blog: "I want a peddle that changes the channels on my TV. Maybe one that's connected to my TiVo, so I can fast forward through the dull parts and still type like the wind. I want a robot who'll answer my phone, and also call publicists and make nicey nice with them, and become their friends and take them out to drinks and learn all of the complicated relationships between them, and then exploit those relationships to get advance tapes and interviews with key figures from the entertainment universe. I'm not malevolent enough to do this dirty work; I prefer to spend my time here, in my lair, barely moving at all.

I have a stupid office chair, but the point is, I don't want to have to sit upright at a desk. Sitting upright at a desk makes me feel like I'm working or something. I prefer for my posture to give the illusion of slacking around the house without a care in the world. Otherwise I feel like I'm working, like I have a job or something. I must trick myself, I must never, ever catch wind of the fact that I have a job with responsibilities and obligations. Otherwise, the brain muscle feels weak and won't wrinkle upon demand. If the brain muscle thinks its being forced to exert itself for pay, it sighs deeply and says, 'I can't think of anything. I'm tired. I need chocolate to think.' "

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